back to blog
yts went to bugis with mum, da yi and grandparents to pray...
then bought a watch quite nice design for only $2.90...
wah shock no nice and cheap....
then went reach home open the letter box....
then mum shock pass ame an letter nestle de...
then when i open guess what i won something....
voucher ha can plan how to spent liao haha....

then today read newspaper for job....
something happen guess for those of u knw...
very pek chek...all the way through the journey...
ya that the for today....

sian dam tired...
study until very tired....
eye lip very suan and pain....
going to close liao.....
exam starts tmr...
2 more paper to go...
then holidays come....
want to find job to work...
haha have been playing pet society to destress myself....
although not much use...
sian....
arghhhh...

Is me back to blog once again...
things to update... last Sunday jas, candy come to my house study....
think everyone of our study so far proceed well....
everyone of us have a great time studying and chattng having lot of funs.....
mum cook a yu pian dang with lots of pei liao inside...hope u all did enjoy the food....

Monday meet jas and kelly to study in sch then after that when to join the feb babies celebration
went to re ben chun to have dinner.....
totally 16 of us....having fun eating dinner...
ohya jas,joanna and i also bought a shirt for kok wai birthday boy :P
took a lot of pictures with classmates...
around 9+pm then leave the place....
went home with jas and sheng jie together on the train...
was tired when reach home....

Tuesday as usual study at home cos exams are coming stressful...
guess what study half way....
realise that my ooad paper with jasmine...
then meet her tmr at library study suan bian take back my paper

Wednesday receive jas msg...
then call her immediately so comfirm the changes with her...
end up decided to study at my house, candy and her is coming too...
nice to have this study group with friends....
meet up jas for MAC breakfast...enjoying eating that cos long time nvr eat liao...
then chat about our young times those naughty things and sha shi that we have done...
haha....after that bought some thing then meet candy at bus stop then go my house together....
chat + studying and thanks for buying the pearly soya bean for me :P
stole some songs from jas...heehee..
change my blog songs too..nice ba...
candy left my house first then jas have dinner with me at my house...

other than that think i told them about there is 1 thing that i have done...
which makes myself unbelievable...cos i myself was shock too...heart beat very fast....
i knw is the right thing to do, for not committing this mistake into that kind of relationship...
really dun have the feel towards XXX the only thing i can say is sorry....
we only can be friends that all...

Relationship to me is now very fragile and heart ache....
all the time i have been acting so brave, I'm shaking inside, Why does it hurts me so
dun wish to touch that for the moment...(although i knw sometimes when it come really cant zhu dang)
trying by all means to forget and let go...
enjoying my life for the time being...
this thought or dream has been floating in my mind this few days...
just dunno why...
just what if, what if one day either i or him meet each other while walking...
seeing either of us hold a hand of a girl or a guy...
how would both of us react???
how would i sort those feeling???
cry immediately or control act like nothing happen numb myself or totally no feeling liao....
i have no ans...

Title: Jordin Sparks - Next To You lyrics

Two 'o clock and I wish that I was sleeping
You're in my head like a song on the radio
All I know is that I got to get next to you
Yeah I got to get next to you
Sitting here turning minutes into hours
To find the nerve just to call you on the telephone
You don't know that I got to get next to you

Maybe were friends
Maybe were more
Maybe it's just my imagination
But I see you stare just a little too long
And it makes me start to wonder
So baby call me crazy
But I think you feel it too
Maybe I, Maybe I
Just got to get next to you

I asked around and I heard that you were talking
Told my girl that you thought I was out of your league
What a fool, I got to get next to you, whoa
Yeah it's five in the morning and I can't go to sleep
'Cause I wish, yeah I wish that you knew what you mean to me
Baby let's get together and end this mystery, oh

Maybe were friends
Maybe were more
Maybe it's just my imagination
But I see you stare just a little too long
And it makes me start to wonder
So baby call me crazy
But I think you feel it too
Maybe I, Maybe I
Just got to get next to you

Whatcha got to say? Whatcha got to do?
How ya get the one you want to want to get next to you?

Whatcha got to say? Whatcha got to do?
How ya get the one you want to want to get next to you?

Whatcha got to say? Whatcha got to do?
How ya get the one you want to want to get next to you?

Whatcha got to say? Whatcha got to do?
How ya get the one you want to want to get next to you?
Yeah, yeah, to want to get next to you

Maybe were friends
Maybe were more
Maybe it's just my imagination
But I see you stare just a little too long
And it makes me start to wonder
So baby call me crazy
But I think you feel it too
Maybe I, Maybe I
Just got to get next to you
Yeah, yeah, yeah
I got to get next to you

不说出的温柔歌词
作词:范逸臣 阿怪 何启弘
作曲:范逸臣

你是否忘记了
那时候的笑容
如果我已不在你心中
舍不得为什么
你说过的以后
留下我能不能圆梦
那天空云很多
看不见你的轮廓
只剩下太多来不及说
(是我你好吗
没什么事
只是想知道你好不好
这是我最后一次打给你了
希望你好好照顾自己)

不说出的温柔
让你离开我
我以为你都会懂
等着你
我才发现难过
很难说有没有
想念过你的手
可能是我不愿去触碰

不记得本来你
有没有擦口红
反正是我已经错过
那天空云很多
看不见你的轮廓
剩下太多来不及说
想哭的冲动
开始在失去以后
才等着你的手
拥抱我的寂寞

该说的时候
早应该大声的说
那种认真的沉默
弄巧成拙
不说出的温柔
让你离开我
我以为你都会懂

想哭的冲动
开始在失去以后
已经擦干了泪
为何还有点痛
该说的时候
早应该大声的说
爱已经留下缺口
剩下沉默
不说出的温柔
让你离开我
去拥抱你要的梦
别担心我
我会好好过

Title: Goodbye
Album: BreakOut
Artist: Miley Cyrus

I can honestly say you've been on my mind
Since I woke up today, up today
I look at your photograph all the time
These memories come back to life
And I don't mind

I remember when we kissed

I still feel it on my lips

The time that you danced with me

With no music playing

But I remember those simple things

I remember 'til I cry

But the one thing I wish I'd forget

The memory I wanna forget

Is goodbye

I woke up this morning and played are song

And throwing my tears, I sang along

I picked up the phone and then put it down'

Cause I know I'm wasting my time

And I don't mind

I remember when we kissed

I still feel it on my lips

The time that you danced with me

With no music playing

But I remember the simple things

I remember 'til I cry

But the one thing I wish I'd forget

The memory I wanna forget

Suddenly my cell phone's blowing up

With your ringtone

I hesitate but answer it anyway

You sound so alone

And I'm surprised to hear you say

You remember when we kissed

You still feel it on your lips

The time that you danced with me

With no music playing

You remember the simple things

We talked 'til we cried

You said that your biggest regret

The one thing you wish I'd forget

Is saying goodbye, saying goodbye

Ooh, goodbye

Is me back to blog...knw is a bit kiddish to play with this thing bt then...

some sort of have the urge to play with it...

Has not been well this few days....

start from the sunday which haven just past...

dunno why my terrible gastric come back again....

very painful have been suffering all the way home.....

almost wanted to cry on the way home...

when reach home took my medicine....

think is went worst ba....

when the medicine take effect, my stomach went luan...

like lao sai for many time liao like that....cant fall aslp....

feel like vomiting.....the next day went to sch early morning...

dun dare to eat anything.....end up lunch force myself to have some food....

guess wat after eating....dam bu shu fu.....feel like vomiting...very xin ku....

today....same thing again ....guess that my gastric haven fully recover ba....

here is come again....sob sob.....arhhh...somemore gt acc exam to study more worst....

tada...is 3 pairs of earings bought by my colleagues....

thanks shu fen and mei fen.....

the deign very nice :P

guess wat is inside this 3 black bags.....

Next comes to Jasmine and Candy...

they bought me a necklace and earings....

so qiao they manage to make it into a set.....

so how do i look candy with those necklace and earings on me ???

haha....beautiful right....

ops...a bit thick skins to say that...haha

yes....here come my birthday presents from my friends.....

this card is from jun fu, andrew and jun kai....

thanks a lot....although u all bouhgt it in a hastily....

bt is a very nice of u all....anyway was surprise to receive it...

cheers

cake cutting section....yummy cakes.....

btw when the candles are still lighted....

i saw the way the white chocolate melts....

dam beautiful...ok although is a small thing....

is it attracts my attention at that moment....

dam it....realise i din make a wish before i blow the cake....

ahhhh..that means no wish to come true this year....

sad case....look ugly when i blow my cake....

brother took this stupid photo with my mouth open....

so ugly....naughty brother....

a photo of me and my delicious birthday cake....

which bought from cake shop near my aunt house.....

hmmm..how come i dun seems to be happy....

on my big day eve......

wonders >.<

here comes my long no upload the birthday photos.....

they help me celebrate on the 1st feb....

together with my relatives....

this is my aunt house...

this is my family...

and that is my brithday cake....

wahaha....

this my house dinning table hall....

looks very neat due to new year da shao chu :D

zhi lian again....haha

back to post.....today just have my PM test...and i can say din manage to finish and i dunno how to answer them think will flunk this paper...very sad very dull....nearly break down again.....

once again thinking of him....dunno why after the incident abt my brithday.....
seems like is very gan ga bu zhi zai now and then once in a while facing him....
i dunno how should i react....how should my feelings goes......
he seems like taking the first steps....bt i just dun dare to.....
being hurt badly once and before.......i dun wish to get another hurting as friend....
do i still really miss/love him ...... really cant answer that question....
in the past i may be still can be firm with my feelings....bt now i really confused....
dunno what the weird feelings is like in me now....
every now and then when i think of him....my heart hurts ache which make me cry....
how can i really let go of him?????

after the briefing for In house project, took cab to jurong point....
surpose to have mood in window shopping de....meet and saw his gv friend...
walk pass gv....his image flash in my mind once again....
sort of feeling funny after exam kena knock by him...
he keep saying sry...while me just smile and walk away...
haiz.....i really dunno what am i doing now....
many unhappy things all happens at once....
i cant cope with these and the stress coming up....
sob sob crying once again >.<

HEAVEN KNOWS
Rick Price

She's always on my mind
From the timeI wake up
Till I close my eyes
She's everywhere I go
She's all I know

And though she's so far away
It just keeps getting stronger everyday
And even now she's gone
I'm still holdin' on

So tell me where do I start
'Cause it's breakin my heart
Don't wanna let her go

Maybe my love will come back someday
Only heaven knows
And maybe our hearts will find a way
Only heaven knows
And all I can do is hope and pray
'Cause heaven knows

My friends keep telling me
That if you really love her
You've gotta set her free
And if she returns in time
I'll know she's mine
So tell me where do I start
'Cause it's breaking my heart
Don't wanna let her go

Maybe my love will come back someday
Only heaven knows
And maybe our hearts will find a way
Only heaven knows
And all I can do is hope and pray
'Cause heaven knows

Why I live in despair
'Cause wide awake or dreaming
I know she's never there
And all the time I act so brave
I'm shakin' inside
Why does it hurt me so

Maybe my love will come back someday
Only heaven knows
And maybe our hearts will find a way
Only heaven knows
And all I can do is hope and pray
'Cause heaven knows
Heaven knows
Heaven knows

this song happens to be played today during on our way home...
and i told jas this song used to be i like de....
so happen let me recall of ytd incident abt him...my birthday...
weird feelings when i receive the msg.....hesitate to reply .....
cos dunno what or how to.....memories flash back once again....
is painful and hard to forget....it really hurts though...
is nice that he still have xin to rmb or knw my birthday....
and i do knw, can feel that he really hesitate very long to take this first move....
weird feelings around me.....confused??
jas suddenly ask me this afternoon....do i still xi huan ta ma???
at that moment in time....sort of dunno how to ans....
and i told her.....is time for me to let go.....

ytd when jun fu return me the PM book...realise that he is acting weird...
bt i din really go borther abt it.....only when jas ask me abt PM qns...
then i start to flip the book....guess what at that moment then i realise that...
there is a birhtday card inside....given by jun fu, andrew and jun kai......
was very surprise and shock.....although is bought in hastily...bt it is very cute....
and nice of u all.....

thanks candy and shingo for the surprise....
bought birthday cake for me....very sweet of u two...
the cake very nice...

guess what the day before my birthday was packing my room...
the bottles of stars for our first months...
and the first my birthday that we celebrate together...
the puzzle that u spent s few nights making for me....
is still in my room...
i saw it....and many thoughts come to my mind.....
sometimes i really feel funny abt myself...
why am i crying when posting this post???....
when i am not surpose to???....
heartache >.<

surpose to be studying bt end up blog first.....things to update....
last night din slp well can see my slpy face and eyes...dam pain and tired...
yup is my big day today....half happy have sad....sad is till that kind almost wanted to cry.....
bought some snacks for the whole class...can see the girls enjoy eating..haha
half way through PM lesson candy not feeling well...end up change plan....
her DWA demo change to tmr afternoon.....the birthday meeting with my colleague also change to friday.....
things are not going right as i wanted to be....exam is this thursday and attachment is coming too ....and 1 more thing DWA presentation screw up...thing cant work on teacher com...while on kelly's com can...i was dam pek chek.....and the teacher promp question suddenly...with no prepartion luckily some manage to scrip through while some cant....
guess wat when i hear my marks...i almost wanted to cry out liao....is like what is the point of
doing everything nice and working, finish early...in the end giv me this kind of shit result....
my A are gone....make sure pull me down from my grade......wth....
many things happen today...which some i dun wish to mention.....seriously....
WAT AM I DOING???WHY SHOULD I PUT IN SO MUCH EFFORT IN THE END THIS IS
THE RESULT I HAVE GOT???>.<